NEW YORK - Major League Soccer (MLS) and the Professional Referee Organization (PRO) today announced that they have hired referee Kevin Glasston to referee upcoming games during the Major League Soccer season.

Glasston is both legally blind and legally deaf, however he fulfills the requirement placed on the league from the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission non-discrimination policy which requires the league to not discriminate based upon any reason.

"I'm excited to start the season and to have the game called at an even pace for both teams," said Mr Glasston to an assembled crowd of reporters. "I feel that my inability to hear or see will only heighten my ability to work efficiently and as an advocate for the game rather than either side."

Statistics note that Mr. Glasston is actually a higher ranked referee in world organizations than any other referee in Major League Soccer, above such stalwarts as Baldomero Toledo and Mark Geiger. He is renowned for his ability to suss out a situation on the field, deliver a judgement and be impartial as he couldn't possibly be biased against any player since he can't actually see them in the first place.

Major League Soccer commissioner Don Garber agreed with this assessment stating, "Well, he couldn't be worse than what we already have."