OPINION: To The Serial Farter In Section 122

The Nutmeg News prints opinion pieces from local contributors, at select times. Today's opinion piece comes from Daryl Jones of Issaquah, Washington. The viewpoints and opinions of Mr. Jones do not necessarily reflect the viewpoints and opinions of The Nutmeg News.

Daryl Jones - Issaquah, WA

TO THE SERIAL FARTER IN ECS (ED - Emerald City Supporters) SECTION 122

Yes, we know who you are. Yes, we know you are here for the boys. However, the noxious gasses that spew forth from your anus with malicious intent are causing near a near fatal arrhythmia among the Rave Green clad crowds that surround you.

There are times in which a man, any man, THIS man longs for the scent of the docks or the spray of a skunk or the scent of the Tacoma Dome over the unctuous and foul smelling scent that emanates from your corn hole. 

Yes, I hear you singing. Yes, I notice you are with the crowd, but my suggestion to you (dear sir) is to put a cork in the back end, not the front end. I would like to drink my beer un-fart flavored. I would like to smell the wafting scent of propane from our flamethrowers rather than your baked beans. 

In short, It is not he who smelt it dealt it, but rather he who dealt it getting belted... in the ear... if you do this again.

Sincerely yours,

Daryl Jones.