Atlanta, GA - An attempt to get friend and co-worker Steph Hillman into Atlanta United failed, on Tuesday, as Atlanta fan Darren Williams entered hour four of explaining player acquisition methodologies, transfer windows, financial acronyms and their place in the league.
"Steph has totally checked out, at this point," stated Mr Williams to The Nutmeg News. "She has that glazed look in her eyes and I think she's forgotten about what we were speaking. I'm going to need some coffee and a whiteboard."
Reportedly, an excited Hillman eagerly accepted the free ticket offer of Mr. Williams, and casually made chit-chat about her excitement about the upcoming game before a stray question about signing players encouraged Williams to begin his at-length explanation of player acquisition methodologies, allocation order, transfer windows, contract examples, contract theories for unknown player financials, team valuations, league structure, and the role of single entity in all of this.
"I just wanted to go to a soccer game, and now.... I just want this to end," stated a frustrated Hillman to The Nutmeg News. "Who thought that making this all this complicated was a good idea? Why doesn't someone just make it a hard cap with actual.... you know..... money? Why can't these teams fly on private jets if their ownership has the money to do so? Who on earth thought the allocation order is something that needs to be continued when it seems to just be bought and sold anyway? What the hell does the draft have to do with any of this?"
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Hillman suddenly finds herself very busy and not entirely certain if she will be able to make the game, now.