Seattle, WA - Area man David Williams announced on Twitter that he was ready to argue the nuances of player acquisition and retention rules in Major League Soccer despite only having a vague understanding of the rules in place.
“The Galaxy are going to be in …. violation…. I think…..,” stated Williams to his Twitter account on Friday. “They should be punished somehow if there’s a mechanism for punishment, or if there isn’t than they shouldn’t be, but maybe they should be anyway in some way if everyone allows that from um…. forthwith… and… um… in perpetuity…. ipso facto.”
Williams was reportedly incensed by the insinuation that the Los Angeles Galaxy might be bending the rules in MLS by keeping four designated players as he stated, “I’m pretty sure that’s unfair,” before he attempted to google the MLS competition rules for 2019.
“As soon as I skim these first few pages I plan on starting a Twitter thread that really is going to sock it to some team or person if I can understand exactly what is going on or maybe not,” muttered Williams to himself as he downloaded the incorrect manual from 2015.
“So they should deduct um, TAM/GAM if the TAM is aged over 10 years in a cherry wood wine barrell? That can’t be right,” stated Williams as he attempted to decipher whatever the hell it is that the league calls the rules these days.
According to his Twitter feed, Williams is not the only person lashing about like an octopus with a ripped tentacle as he reflexively labled the league or maybe the front office or maybe the disciplinary panel or maybe the commissioner or maybe the league reporters and coverage as cheats and swindlers unless maybe they aren’t because there’s some kind of spreadsheet thing that makes sense and ok, whatever they are still cheats or not.
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as the league considers more rules to cover the rules to cover the rules to cover the rules that someone else is breaking but not really because the rules are all made up anyway.