Cincinnati, OH - FC Cincinnati fan Davy Hernandez reportedly excused himself to the bathroom after realizing that a cutlery set given to him for Christmas by his extended family contained a wooden spoon.

Stating, "Oh fuck, not again," Hernandez rushed to the bathroom for the rest of the gift opening with his in-laws. “The ladle and salad forks were awesome, they fit with my kitchen décor, but I can’t help to think that my in-laws are making fun of me with the wooden spoon inclusion. Who includes a wooden spoon? WHO EVEN NEEDS ONE,” stated a retching Hernandez as he scrolled the hashtag and repeated the litany against fear.

"We looked high and low for the RIGHT set for Davy, and this was the gift,” stated Tom and Carla Overbeek. “I just don’t understand why he went pale when he opened it, It’s not like we got him a Kevin Schindler kit.”

For his part, Hernandez stated that he was confident that his sick feeling would pass as he stated, “Well, I’ve been through this before in 2021, 2020, and 2019.

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Hernandez just scrolls through Instagram reels from the dark corner of the couch and slowly stares off into the distance.