Omaha, NE - Jeremy Eubanks of Omaha announced to friends and family today that he enlisted in the United States Army in order to scout the upcoming World Cup 2022 held in Qatar.
“WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“I believe our boys are going to get it done in World Cup Qualifying,” stated Eubanks as he attempted to calm the nerves of his mother and father. “It’s absolutely going to help out my American Outlaws friends in order to be able to scout where we can hold our 2022 prefunk over in Qatar.”
With potential deployment to a whole host of nations in his very near future, Eubanks indicated that he was excited to see some of the territory overseas as he announced that he had a case of World Cup Fever.
“Qatar has a a window seat view of Iran, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, the United Arab Emirates and Iraq. There’s a pretty decent chance that I’ll be able to really scout out the best locations to eat, drink, party and cheer on the stars and stripes from wherever I end up getting posted. Given the current political climate, I’ll be almost guaranteed to have several deployments to the area and I’m guessing that by the time 2022 comes around that I’ll be a complete local.”
Despite the current tension in the region, Eubanks illustrated his positive thought as he stated, “I can’t wait for the boys to crush the hexagonal just like we crushed the Gulf War back in 1990, and 1991, and the Iraq War in 2003, and 2004, and 2005, and 2006, and 2007, and 2008, and 2009, and 2010, and 2011, and 2014, and 2015, and 2016, and 2017, and 2018, and 2019, and 2020 and just like Afghanistan in 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020 and just like Syria… well… you get the picture. WOO HEX! WOO CONCACAF!”
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Eubanks ensures that everyone pays dues to al-Udeid American Outlaws in order to get priority tickets.