CHICAGO - Bored with Major League Soccer, Fire midfielder Bastian Schweinsteiger signed a contract with the Chicago Cubs, this week, as a utility shortstop.
Let us play some of ze catch, ja?!
"I was mentally exhausted with the repetitious nature of practice and playing," stated Schweinsteiger to The Nutmeg News. "I needed something more than Major League Soccer could provide so one of my teammates told me to go, 'Bo Jackson on all their asses,' and I guess joining the Cubs is just that."
Reportedly, Schweinsteiger is a two tool shortstop excelling in speed and fielding ability. He gained positive reviews from his new teammates and coaches with manager Joe Maddon saying, "It's nice to finally have some international players from Germany in the squad. We hope that the Cubs can finally challenge for a World Cup title with Bastian on board."
Sources close to Schweinsteiger state that the midfielder is, as well, considering signing up with the Chicago Bears to play both kicker and outside linebacker.
"He wants to be a complete player and there's nothing more complete than making it onto a lucrative NFL sponsorship deal," stated one anonymous friend.
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Schweinsteiger starts his strict weight gain program to get in shape for Baseball.