Atlanta, GA - Atlanta United fan Andrew Sanders stated, “sure the United States government is teetering on the precipice, but have you SEEN these 2025 MLS power rankings?”

Sanders reportedly scrolled by a news report of Elon Musk’s takeover of the United States government and the mass resignations of district attorneys in New York in order to show an MSN.com power ranking that had Atlanta United at #1 for the 2025 season.

“It’s gonna be bonkers this season,” stated Sanders to friends. “Who cares about witnessing the slow strip mining of the United States government…..we also might have a great season!”

Sources indicate that Sanders only started caring about Atlanta United after hearing that everything was going right, for once. Something that he uses to distract himself from the everyday mundanity of social collapse.

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Sanders sends a Tweet about all the, “negativity ruining my gameday experience.”