LOS ANGELES - After the 0-0 draw with Bosnia and Herzegovina ended on Sunday evening, an ecstatic Dan Flynn, CEO of US Soccer, stated that it was time to raise ticket prices again.
Look at all these suckers.
"After such an exciting, thrilling and meaningful 0-0 draw it is important for the federation to realize the demand for our product and adjust our ticket prices upward accordingly," stated Flynn to The Nutmeg News.
"We've made it a policy to raise ticket prices nearly every year for every kind of game and these tune ups for World Cup 2022 are vitally important to the health of the game in this country."
Fans were, reportedly, thrilled by the moribund draw as one US fan stated, "I'm going to go back to the Goodwill and get my US kit that I donated after we were knocked out of qualifying for World Cup 2018! It's going to be amazing! I might even buy a kit for World Cup 2022 in a few days. I know they won't change that kit over the next 5 years so we should be good, there."
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as US Soccer doubles ticket prices for any upcoming "victory friendlies".