Portland, OR - Timbers fan Jimmy Davis emerged from a cocoon made of shredded front office scarves and memorabilia to announce his third metamorphosis was complete into a fan concerned by style and dress. As Davis stepped out of the sticky womb like structure wearing a Fred Perry polo and new pair of Adidas Sambas he announced that he was ready for the game against Seattle on Sunday.
I wasn't ultra before, but now I'm VERY ultra.
Davis began his existence as an unconcerned and unloving soccer fan who went to a Timbers game because his friend Bradley Warner had a free ticket.
"Yeah, that was before my First Metamorphosis," stated Mr Davis to The Nutmeg News. "During my first larval stage I wore front office scarves and a Timbers shirt I bought at the grocery store. Then after my First metamorphosis I transitioned into a man who had his face painted, brought a funny hat to games, and drank too much cheap beer"
According to Davis, he then began to feel a transition beyond his face painting stage as he completed a Second Metamorphosis.
"I really spun up a dense web of change as I moved into wearing more supporter gear and scarves," stated Davis whistfully. "I really threw myself into the world of the Timbers Army and wore their gear everywhere, even to work. After a few years I could feel the pull of nature prevailing upon my own instincts as I started to collect all my former items of fandom and spun a new cocoon where i transitioned into my Third Metamorphosis as a casual."
Davis now only wears terrace clothing made popular by fans in England as his closet filled up with Fred Perry, Sergio Tachini, and Adidas.
"I've dropped the face painting, I leave the scarves at home and now I just go nattily dressed," stated Davis. "It's a new epoch in my evolution, and I'm excited about my upcoming fourth evolution where I spawn and remain at home to watch games from my couch."
The Nutmeg News will have more on Mr Davis as he sells off his former clothes to desperate fans only emerging from their second metamorphosis.