Foxborough, MA - New England Revolution owner Robert Kraft stated that ex head coach Jay Heaps job, “will be evaluated at the end of the 2018 season,” as he cast doubt on the long term position of the manager that he already fired last year.
“anyone remember the tea men?”
“Jay has done a wonderful job with us,” stated Kraft to two bloggers and a random man holding ice cream cone that looked like a microphone. “And we will take into consideration his entire body of work over the past few years and not just the 2018 season.”
According to insiders, Kraft forgot that he fired Heaps last season and replaced him with Brad Friedel as he continued to praise Heaps for his tenacity.
“It’s been a difficult year, but we haven’t shied away from the challenges. Jay approached the middle of the season like Tom Brady. He really read the coverage and continued to find a way to complete his passes until we were all yelling FIRST DOWN. After all, Jay couldn’t find another wide receiver to compete with Rob Gronkowski. How could he? Rob is not replaceable. Look, if Jay wanted to find the edge against the Colts, then he’s going to start having to look at whether he can continue playing Sony Michel. I mean, another Super Bowl isn’t going to win itself. Anyway, um… woo soccer.”
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Kraft tells his staff to tell Jonathan Kraft to tell his staff to tell Brian Bilello to tell Michael Burns to tell his staff to fire Heaps anyway.