Mount Graham, AZ - Astronomers with the Large Binocular Telescope at the Mount Graham International Observatory (MGIO) predict an, “Incredible,” cosmic collision in space between Kendall Waston’s penalty ball and Chris Wondolowski’s World Cup ball leading to an event that may light up the night sky soon.

“It’s incredible to see these two now celestial bodies meet like this,” stated MGIO Astronomer Anil Patil. The Wondolowski ball was in Mars gravitational pull for the last few years. The likelihood of these two balls hitting each other space was extremely low.”

Astrophysicist Gus Crawford predicted a spectacular event, "When two gaseous giants fall into each others orbits we can all expect to see some incredible things. This is just like when Bruce Arena took over for Jurgen Klinsmann during USMNT World Cup qualifying. Nothing really survived after that.”

According to our sources, NASA is carefully watching in case any of the former earthly objects collide and rebound back to Earth. The USMNT Astronomy division predicts that there should be nothing to worry about.

“A lot of our shots and penalties end up out there. We don’t really see what the big deal is about this whole thing. Half of the Van Allen radiation belt is made up of shots from USMNT fullbacks, midfielders and forwards,” stated MGIO director and lead USMNT Astronomer Leonard Chang.

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Jurgen Locadia’s miss accelerates towards the singularity with increasing speed causing a brief flicker of hope in the heart of Dr. Venkatesh Belsare that perhaps the collision will just nullify the galaxy and solve the problem of everyone having to suffer through the rest of 2020.