CHICAGO - Chicago Fire fan Bradley Owens stated that he was, “eagerly awaiting the end of the 2025 season,” as he went another week somehow still a fan of the team.

“I’m already making room for the wooden spoon,” stated Owens to The Nutmeg News. “Although it’s going to be a dogfight with Montreal.”

Sources say that Owens was tried to keep up a brave front, but with just about a month until pre-season made the fan slip back into his typical depressive and pessimistic attitude.

“Well, I mean….. It’s just the Fire,” stated Owens to his therapist as he touched the Lexapro in his jeans pocket. “Anyway, I’m doing fine. Yes. Just fine. I just can’t wait for it to be over.”

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Owens convinces himself everything will be fine. Totally. Completely. Are there any rumors of a new Chicago MLS team?