West Linn, OR - Timbers fan Thom Sanderson has achieved the accolade of Best Timbers Fan In The World after acquiring a recent scarf made by members of the R/Timbers subreddit.
"I wonder if I could just nip down there and take a few. I just need a taste. Just a simple taste. Something to cut the edge. Just need a fix. Anyone got a dollar so I can buy a scarf?"
Mr. Sanderson was presented with a plaque stating that after collecting 356 scarves, 2000 patches, 194 programs, and a very large number of collectible cups that he was the best fan out of all the fans of the Timbers anywhere, ever.
The Nutmeg News spoke to Mr Sanderson on Wednesday about this massive achievement.
"Well, I was late to the game as I only started collecting scarves in 2010, but I managed to really find a good way to collect a massive amount of them. Now, granted, this took a ton of disposable income that I probably should have been saving to spend on a house given the recent cost of living increases, but honestly... I've got to be there for my team."
After 5 years of hoarding collectibles at his 1 bedroom apartment in West Linn, Sanderson finally realized that he was only one scarf away from reaching the rarefied status of being The Best Timbers Fan In The World.
"I was sitting on 355 scarves and 2000 patches after acquiring a set of patches in a trade for a program from 2011, so I realized all I needed was one more scarf, just one more scarf to be The Best Timbers Fan In The World. The only way to go was to find a new scarf that I didn't have so I bought one of those scarves from those fellas online at Reddit. I don't even go there for news, but I just needed the collectible."
Sanderson admitted that recently his car broke down and he is trying to figure out how to fix it given that his money is all tied up in diversified collectible goods.
"It's tough when your money is in the collectibles market, but this will pay off for me in the future. I'll be able to control the price points here in a few years when new fans are looking for a way to be authentic."
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Mr Sandersons hopes are crushed as Steve Arbogast passes him to become The Best Timbers Fan In The World by collecting 357 scarves.